Friday, May 22, 2015

Wednesday, May 20, 2015

Game 40: Twins at Pirates

Locke and Pelfrey tonight.

Bucs are just 3.5 games back in the Wild Card race.

Tuesday, May 19, 2015

Game 39: Twins at Pirates

Liriano spotted his former teammates a seven run lead, but the PBC have fought back and now trail 8-2 in the fourth.

Sunday, May 17, 2015

Game 38: Pirates at Cubs

Burnett and Arrieta, scoreless after four. Citizen Kang gets the start at short.

Saturday, May 16, 2015

Game 37: Pirates at Cubs

Cole and the PBC lost 4-1 to Lester and the Cubs today. Bucs are 17-20.

Friday, May 15, 2015

Thursday, May 14, 2015

Game 35: Pirates at Phillies

The Harangutan is befuddling the PBC, who trail 4-0 in the 8th.

Still tucked in.

Wednesday, May 13, 2015

Game 34: Pirates at Phillies

Liriano and Hamels tonight as the PBC try to win their 5th straight.

Sean Rodriquez is batting second and playing 1B.

Tuesday, May 12, 2015

Game 33: Pirates at Phillies

Burnett got the bunt down without incident, Bucs win. Cutch and J-Hay went yard.

Monday, May 11, 2015

Game 32: Pirates at Phillies

Cole takes on Jerome Williams and the hapless last-place Phillies.

Prepare to untuck.

Sunday, May 10, 2015

Game 31: Cardinals at Pirates

Locke and Lyons, starting in a bit. Sean Rodriguez is starting in RF.

Saturday, May 09, 2015

Game 30: Cardinals at Pirates

Bucs win a thriller 7-5. In case you missed it, Neil Walker and the new Dandy House guy pulled off the first 4-5-4 triple play in MLB history. Entertained.

Friday, May 08, 2015

Game 29: Cardinals at Pirates

Frank the Tank and Wacha, starting soon.

The PBC are one game back in the Wild Card race.

Thursday, May 07, 2015

Game 28: Reds at Pirates

Burnett will try to shutout the Reds while the PBC tries to score a run vs. some hapless rookie kid.

Wednesday, May 06, 2015

Game 27: Reds at Pirates

Game on at 7.

Gerrit Cole will pitch for the Pirates. The Reds start Mike Leake.

Free t-shirt night.

Tuesday, May 05, 2015

Game 26: Reds at Pirates

Bucs are down 4-1 in the 7th and have just two hits. Still tucked in.

Sunday, May 03, 2015

Game 25: Pirates at Cardinals

Bucs and Cards in extra innings again, with the Bucs leading 1 bunt to zero.

Saturday, May 02, 2015

Game 24: Pirates at Cardinals

The Bucs outbunted the Cards 2-0 today. Let's just leave it at that.

Friday, May 01, 2015

Game 23: Pirates at Cardinals

The PBC will try to bunt a run in for Mr. Shaving Cream Pie tonight, as he faces off against the delicate Lance Lynn

Thursday, April 30, 2015

NFL Draft

Steelers pick 22nd tonight, as the PBC rests.

Wednesday, April 29, 2015

Game 22: Pirates at Cubs

Gerrit Cole takes on George Hendrick, starts in a bit.

Tuesday, April 28, 2015

Game 21: Pirates at Cubs

Locke and Wood, getting ready to start. PBC two games back.

Monday, April 27, 2015

Game 20: Pirates at Cubs

The Vanimal battles M.C. Hammel tonight.

John Russell's kid makes his Wrigley debut as the Bucs look for their 6th win in a row.

Sunday, April 26, 2015

Game 19: Pirates at Diamondbacks

Liriano and Hellraiser underway.

Bucs up 2-0 in the bottom of the first. Already untucked.

Saturday, April 25, 2015

Game 18: Pirates at Diamondbacks

The surging Pirates will beat down the half-decent Arizona team in about an hour.

Burnett and "Rubby De La Rosa" are the scheduled starters.

Friday, April 24, 2015

Game 16: Pirates at Diamondbacks

Cole and Colanderhead, later tonight. The PBC is three games out.

Thursday, April 23, 2015

Game 15: Cubs at Pirates

Jeff Locke and George Hendrick, underway. Bucs down 4-1 in the 5th.

Wednesday, April 22, 2015

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Game 13: Cubs at Pirates

Liriano and Wood underway. Bucs are down 3-2 after four and a half.

Monday, April 20, 2015

Game 12: Cubs at Pirates

Burnett and his astronomical SCPITFORP (Shaving Cream Pies In The Face Over Replacement Player) will try to move runners from station to station with the game's most exciting play, the sacrifice bunt.

Meanwhile, the hapless Cubs start a bunch of kids whose names I don't recognize.

Sunday, April 19, 2015

Game 11: Brewers at Pirates

Cole and Garza, underway.

Still untucked from last night's Marte Partay.

Friday, April 17, 2015

Game 10: Brewers at Pirates

These meaningless Spring Training games must end pretty soon.

Meanwhile, Nelson and Locke at 7. Untuckery at 9.

Wednesday, April 15, 2015

Game 9: Tigers at Pirates

Liriano takes on Randall Simon tonight.

The PBC are 2 games out of first place.

Tuesday, April 14, 2015

Game 8: Tigers at Pirates

Burnett and Greene, starting soon.

Rajai Davis is leading off for the hapless Tigers.

Monday, April 13, 2015

Game 7: Tigers at Pirates

Home Opener today features Cole taking on Anibal the Cannibal and the Tigers.

The Tigers are 6-0, so their odds of winning another consecutive baseball game are approaching zero.

Sunday, April 12, 2015

Game 6: Pirates at Brewers

Sadler and Lohse.

The Pirates will start another long winning streak at two.

Saturday, April 11, 2015

Game 5: Pirates at Brewers

The Pirates continue their winning streak against the winless Brewers tonight.

Worley and Jimmy Nelson will start. Game on around 7. Untucking by 9.

Friday, April 10, 2015

Game 4: Pirates at Brewers

Locke takes on Fiers and the hapless, winless, 0-3 Brewers. Game starts soon.

Thursday, April 09, 2015

Game 3: Pirates at Reds

Burnett got the bunt down, without injury or incident.

Wednesday, April 08, 2015

Monday, April 06, 2015

Game 1: Pirates at Reds

Cueto and Liriano, starting soon.

2015 HW Readers' Poll

After a long relaxing off season in the Beer Fort Dandy House, it is prediction time again.

1. How many wins for the 2015 Bucs?
2. On what day will the Bucs clinch the NL Central?
3. Which Bucco will be the World Series MVP?
4. 2015 Whipping Boy?
5. Other predictions?

I'll start:
1. 94
2. September 22nd
3. Polanco
4. Kang, who will later reveal he injured himself carrying a dead deer up a steep flight of stairs
5. New defensive shift where Sean Rodriguez stands halfway up third base line then as ball is thrown, runs and dives in front of batter to deflect liners. LaFramboise converted to 1B. Bastardo fisticuffs. Tony Sanchez acts like fool during post-World Series White House visit.

Friday, March 20, 2015

Spring training

It's going on right now.

Pirates are quickly returning to dynasty shape.

Thursday, October 30, 2014

CHAMPS!

Congratulations to the 2014 World Champion Pittsburgh Pirates!

Here in the Beer Fort we will stay untucked all offseason. We now turn to cheering the Steelers on to another consecutive Super Bowl Championship.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

World Series Game 4: Royals at Pirates

Game on. It is quite a scene in PNC Park. The first 40,000 fans were given champagne goggles. The Pirates have taken the field, untucked and in champagne goggles. Even the umpires are wearing champagne goggles.

Pirates up 4-0 on that inside-the-park bunt home run.

Friday, October 24, 2014

World Series Game 3: Royals at Pirates

Up 2-0 after that 21-run win, people are wondering if it possible for the Pirates to sweep this series in only three games.

Game underway. No score, but the Pirates are threatening. Vanimal and Guthrie are the starters. Vanimal pitching in prescription champagne goggles.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

World Series Game 2: Pirates at Royals

Game on, and the Pirates are up 3-0 after Cole's stupendously placed 3-RBI bunt.

Untucking in the Beer Fort. The sweep feels inevitable.

Tuesday, October 21, 2014

World Series Game 1: Pirates at Royals

Liriano and Shields tonight at 8.

In a bizarre PR move, the Bucs have added Manny Sanguillen to the World Series roster, who will serve up barbecue to the players in the dugout.

It appears the PBC will not be wearing champagne goggles for Game 1.

Wednesday, October 15, 2014

NLCS Game 4: Cardinals at Pirates

The Pirates look to close out this sweep tonight at home. The untucked Pirates, anticipating another steamrolling of the hapless Cardinals, will play the game in champagne goggles.

Several layers of decorative bunting adorn the inside of the Beer Fort.

Shelby Miller and Jeff Locke will be the starters.

Tuesday, October 14, 2014

NLCS Game 3: Cardinals at Pirates

The PBC look to continue the sweep of the hapless passed-out-at-the-red-light Cardinals. It will be the Vanimal vs. Lackey, game starting soon.

Here in the Beer Fort, we already have our champagne goggles on, and are already completely untucked. Next stop, World Series.

Sunday, October 12, 2014

NLCS Game 2: Pirates at Cardinals

Pirates look to extend their series lead to 2-0 after last night's commanding win. By hitting for the cycle, driving in seven, and turning that unassisted triple play in the second, Jay Hay may have played the greatest game in NLCS history. None of this matters without the series win, of course.

Cole and Lynn starting. Rob Mackowiak has re-joined the team and will be available as a pinch hitter.

Saturday, October 11, 2014

Tuesday, October 07, 2014

NLDS Game 4: Nationals at Pirates

Former White Flag Ryan Vogelsong makes his dramatic Pirates return tonight after being claimed off waivers yesterday. He will face Gio Gonzalez.

Rinku Singh has been suspended for the rest of the postseason for his Chan Ho Park-style drop kick to Bryce Harper's face yesterday. The mysterious Romulo! Sanchez has come out of hiding and retirement to fill Rinku's bullpen spot.

Monday, October 06, 2014

NLDS Game 3: Nationals at Pirates

After that 15-inning nailbiter on Saturday, the Pirates bring the series home for game 3.

Fister and Locke will be the starters. Game on at 7. Stadium will be LOUD.

Sunday, October 05, 2014

NFL Week 3: Steelers at Jaguars

Amidst the Pirates' playoff excitement, let's not forget about the 2-2 Steelers, who will crush the hapless Jags today.

Saturday, October 04, 2014

NLDS Game 2: Pirates at Nationals

Still untucked from the beer fort party following Frankie's three-hit gem. Cleared some additional space on the wall of glory. Pirates lead the series, 1-0.

Cole 45 and Zimmerman. Game just underway.

Friday, October 03, 2014

NLDS Game 1: Pirates at Nationals

The Bucs look to continue their momentum coming off their miraculous 9-8 comeback in 12 innings. Game 1 features Liriano and Strasburg, getting ready to start.

Thursday, October 02, 2014

NL Wild Card (for real): Giants at Pirates

After yesterday's meaningless exhibition game, it's time to get down to business and play this one-game playoff for real.

Not sure who's starting, but the game must be starting soon. Heading down to the ballpark!

Wednesday, October 01, 2014

NL Wild Card Game: Giants at Pirates

The games begin tonight. The Beer Fort is ready. We have extra black-and-gold bunting, extra black IPAs, and we cleared a little spot on the wall for a new glorious picture.

"Mad" Bumgamer and likely WS MVP Edinson Volquez get the start. Game on at 8.

Sunday, September 28, 2014

Game 162: Pirates at Reds

Cole and Cueto underway, tied 1-1 in the 5th. Strong PENNANT smell still wafting into the Beer Fort's windows.

Saturday, September 27, 2014

Game 161: Pirates at Reds

Liriano and Simon starting soon with the pennant on the line.

Friday, September 26, 2014

Game 160: Pirates at Reds

Free t-shirt Friday as Worley and Leake get the start.

Game on at 7.

Thursday, September 25, 2014

Game 159: Pirates at Brewers

Volquez and Hale underway. Bickle just went yard to put the PBC up 1-0 in the first. Smell of PENNANT wafting into the Beer Fort windows.

Wednesday, September 24, 2014

Game 158: Pirates at Braves

Locke and Teheran underway. The Bucs have generously spotted the Braves 4 runs to make the late-inning comeback more entertaining.

Tuesday, September 23, 2014

Game 157: Pirates at Braves

Cole and Wood starting soon with the Division and Playoffs on the line.

Magic number down to 2.

Monday, September 22, 2014

Game 156: Pirates at Braves

Liriano battles the Harangutan, starting soon.

The hapless Braves fired their general manager this morning, apparently for not caring about winning or the PLAYOFFS.

PBC magic number is 3.

Sunday, September 21, 2014

Saturday, September 20, 2014

Game 154: Brewers at Pirates

I will prolly do a half-assed half-tuck in time for the national anthem.

Large beer party ongoing at beer fort. Clearing spots on the wall for new framed photos.

Garza and Volquez.

Friday, September 19, 2014

Game 153: Brewers at Pirates

Locke and Gallardo starting soon with the Playoffs on the line. The raucous Beer Fort masses are all preparing to untuck.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Game 152: Red Sox at Pirates

Cole and Workman starting soon. Does the cheapskate owner of the hapless Bosox even care about winning?

Wednesday, September 17, 2014

Game 151: Red Sox at Pirates

As the Brewers and the Cardinals mangle one another, the surging Pirates continue a home series against the hapless, mismanaged, small-market Boston Red Sox. I almost feel sorry for the fans of this team.

Taylor Bucholz will start opposite playoff ace Francisco Liriano.

Playoff tickets on sale tomorrow morning.

Tuesday, September 16, 2014

Game 150: Red Sox at Pirates

Martay Partay in the 6th with the Bucs up 3-0 and the Playoffs on the line.

Monday, September 15, 2014

Off day

Bucs are off today, so should be able to get in extra bunting practice. Meanwhile, White Flag Vogelsong starts for the Giants, who are 3 games up for the first wild card slot.

Sunday, September 14, 2014

Game 149: Cubs at Pirates

Turner and Volquez starting soon.

At 78-70, the Pirates are 3.5 back of the Cardinals and up 1.5 over the slumping Brewers. If the season ended today, the Pirates would be the last playoff seed.

Saturday, September 13, 2014

Game 148: Cubs at Pirates

Locke takes on Doubront and the hapless Cubs tonight. Magic number still at 2.5.

Skyblast w/ Lynyrd Skynyrd after the W.

Friday, September 12, 2014

Game 147: Cubs at Pirates

Cole and the PBC are up 6-3 in the sixth against the hapless stone-handed Cubs. Already untucked.

Thursday, September 11, 2014

NFL Week 2: Steelers at Ravens

No elevator jokes will be made the Steelers win at football.

Game 146: Pirates at Phillies

Frankie takes on Mr. STFD Shaving-Cream-Pie-in-Your-Face You'll-Bunt-Your-Eye-Out, starting soon. Meanwhile, Petey is out for the season with a broken foot. No word on laundry cart damage.

The Cards lost earlier today, so PBC magic number is 2.5

Wednesday, September 10, 2014

Game 145: Pirates at Phillies

The Vanimal and the PBC take an early 2-0 lead in the first vs. Jerome Williams, whoever that is.

Tuesday, September 09, 2014

Game 144: Pirates at Phillies

PBC down 4-3 in the eighth as they prepare for a dramatic comeback win.

Monday, September 08, 2014

Game 143: Pirates at Phillies

Locke and Kendrick soon.

Pirates are 4.5 back of St. Louis.

Game 142: Pirates at Cubs

Gerrit Cole went yard and the PBC opened a 19-hit can of whoopass on the hapless Cubs today. Magic number at 4.5.

Saturday, September 06, 2014

Game 141: Pirates at Cubs

Yesterday's continuation is underway, tied at 3 in the 7th.

After that, Doubront and Liriano with the playoffs on the line.

Friday, September 05, 2014

Game 140: Pirates at Cubs

Feeling surly and out of sorts this afternoon, lounging about in a lawn chair outside the beer fort, ready to take in a day game after a week of frustratingly meaningless exhibition games.

All-Worldly and Wada will be the starters.

Wednesday, September 03, 2014

Game 139: Pirates at Cardinals

Volquez and Miller underway, scoreless in the fifth. Magic number back up to 4.

Tuesday, September 02, 2014

Game 138: Pirates at Cardinals

Locke and Wainwright starting soon. Bucs' magic number at three.

Sunday, August 31, 2014

Game 136: Reds at Pirates

Liriano and Cueto starting now. Bucs magic number at two.

Saturday, August 30, 2014

Game 135: Reds at Pirates

The Pirates continue to round into WS Champion form at just the right time, like the professionals they are.

Looks like the hapless Reds are starting Randall Simon. That says everything you need to know about the Cincinnati team. He'll square off with future WS MVP Vance Worley.

Friday, August 29, 2014

Game 134: Reds at Pirates

Free T-Shirt Night! Leake and Volquez start at seven. The Bucs' magic number to clinch the pennant is 4.

Wednesday, August 27, 2014

Game 133: Cardinals at Pirates

Locke and Wainwright underway. Bucs are up 2-1 in the third after IFD went yard again. Bickle just bunted the bases loaded. Prepare to untuck.

Tuesday, August 26, 2014

Monday, August 25, 2014

Off day

The World-Series-Bound PBC had the day off today. Perhaps the time wasted on a meaningless split squad scrimmage could have been better used on extra bunting practice. Real games and pennant race starts up again tomorrow.

Sunday, August 24, 2014

Game 130: Pirates at Brewers

Future WS MVP Vance Worley starts against Mike Fiers, who has also been throwing up some postseason-worthy starts. Game on shortly. Been untucked all weekend.

Saturday, August 23, 2014

Game 129: Pirates at Brewers

Peralta and Volquez underway with Petey playing first base. Bucs need another win as I'm still untucked from last night.

Friday, August 22, 2014

Game 128: Pirates at Brewers

Gallardo and Locke starting soon. This game will be featured heavily on the 2014 PBC World Champions DVD as one of the turning points to the pennant. Already untucked.

Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Game 127: Braves at Pirates

The PBC will try to WIN tonight against Alex Wood. Gerrit Cole has returned, in time to clinch the pennant.

Tuesday, August 19, 2014

Game 126: Braves at Pirates

Liriano takes on the Harangutan, starting shortly. Cutch has returned, in time to clinch the pennant.

Sunday, August 17, 2014

Game 124: Pirates at Nationals

Volquez and Fister just underway. NFW has returned to clinch the pennant. Prepare to untuck.